3/17/2010
Wednesday morning

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Architectural wonders: Orlando tourist attractions have state-of-the-art enclosures designed on the Mobius concept so you will never have to stand in a long line. Your time will go faster if you chant the mantra Shuffle, shuffle, shuffle...lean...wait...shuffle, shuffle, shuffle. Then, there is the thrill of not knowing if you will end up speaking to an outrageously perky Thrill Ride Host or a time-share weasel.
Disney has furloughed a lot of their part-timers, as have a lot of the hotels. When you dont have banquets, you dont need waiters and waitresses. You dont need cooks, et cetera, so there are cutbacks, said Bill Peeper, president of the Orlando/Orange County Convention & Visitors Bureau.
If you drive to Orlando from the North, I suggest either Interstate 95 or Interstate 75. Both offer an endless stretch of flat, featureless terrain from the Georgia border to the grid-lock of the constantly under construction major access roads of Orlando proper. If you bring children, stop in the first Stuckeys and pick up a road kill identification manual so they can see what an uncrushed Armadillo looks like.
We go to local communities. We approach groups and special discounts for people that live in the Orlando area, said Andres Cibotti, the theaters vice president.
* The Universal Studios Florida Barney Fun Place (yes, sadly, according to adverts I saw for the Orlando Tourism Board, its open this year too); appropriate ones to write would be Universal Studios itself, the folks in head of both the Universal Studios parks, and possibly the tourism board for Orlando, Florida (yes, you could say youre boycotting the entire Orlando tourism complex till they get that damn purple dino outtadeah)
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